most likely you'll go your way and i'll go mine by ben tanzer

Ben Tanzer wrote another book. It is called, "most likely you'll go your way and i'll go mine." He is a very nice man. His head maybe isn't on straight. Neither is mine. People often ask us what we are looking at. We say nothing. Here is a segment from the book. I like this part because it makes me think of this party I went to where someone showed up with a fur scarf and another person showed up in a white t-shirt and a mustache and three other girls showed up looking like they hadn't removed any of their make up from the previous week. I thought, "Hot, score, vagina, I'm getting laid tonight," and then I remembered my girlfriend was with me and I thought, 'I hope she doesn't read this review.' Anyway, here is a section of "most likely you'll go your way and i'll go mine":

We were at a party. I sat on the couch. The lamp turned into a _____. I think I was supposed to be impressed. I think I was. We were the first people at the party. The party kind of ______. I think it was my fault. I told the person sitting next to me that parties are fun. They didn’t hear me. Then someone with a sheepskin coat walked in and I laughed. I said, “Your coat is kind of like my friend’s ______.” She thanked me. I was surprised she took it as a compliment. I tried to think of something else to say. The coat winked at me and said, “I’m not a sheep. I’m a llama.” I think the party picked up at that point. I watched the television. No sounds came out of the television. I thought, “The whole world is broken.” Then I said to no one, “I should have gone to school to become a man who fixes ______.” At some point you came over and said, “WHHHHHHHHHHATCHA DOIN?” And I said, “MMMMMMMMMMMMkay,” and thought we would start dancing at that point, but we went home instead.

Ok, nevermind, I think I lied. I don’t think Ben wrote this.