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Jon Brower Minnoch by Chris Killen

jon brower minnoch

Jon Brower Minnoch is lying on a hospital bed. It is 1983.
John Brower Minnoch is about to die. There are nurses in the room. There are
thirteen nurses in the room. The nurses are saying something. Jon Brower
Minnoch isn’t saying anything to the nurses. The nurses are trying to change
Jon Brower Minnoch’s bedsheets. It takes thirteen nurses to change Jon Brower
Minnoch’s bedsheets, because Jon Brower Minnoch is ‘the heaviest man in
recorded history’. I just read this on wikipedia.

Jon Brower Minnoch is turning his head
away from the thirteen nurses, maybe, and looking out the window. Jon Brower
Minnoch is thinking something. I have no idea what Jon Brower Minnoch is
thinking.

It is 1983. It is September 10th,
1983, which is the day Jon Brower Minnoch dies. It is some time in the morning.
Maybe there is a TV in the room. Maybe the TV is on. I have no idea.

Jon Brower Minnoch is breathing in and
out. He is thinking things. He is blinking his eyelids. He is feeling things in
his hands and legs and in other parts of his body.

I don’t want to go any further than that.
I don’t want to try and guess what Jon Brower Minnoch is thinking about,
because I am not Jon Brower Minnoch, and I don’t think I have ‘what it takes’
to ‘get inside’ the mind of Jon Brower Minnoch and try and guess what the
‘heaviest man in recorded history’ is thinking.

I am imagining one of Jon Brower Minnoch’s
relatives googling ‘Jon Brower Minnoch’ and coming across this story and
feeling insulted.

Right now, I feel a bit like the ‘smallest
man in recorded history’. I feel about 4” by 1”. I feel like I could easily
climb inside a shoe and fall asleep.

Jon Brower Minnoch is lying on a bed. I
just found out that I am single by looking at facebook. There was no facebook
in 1983. Jon Brower Minnoch is maybe looking at the nurses. Jon Brower Minnoch
is maybe heterosexual. He is maybe looking at one of the nurses and it is a
female nurse and he is imagining that the female nurse is not wearing a nurse
uniform. Or maybe Jon Brower Minnoch is so far into death that he has no sexual
feelings anymore. I have no idea. I just had the fact that I am single
confirmed by looking at a myspace page.

It is 1983.

There is no internet.

There is just Jon Brower Minnoch on a bed
and thirteen nurses and lots of other things in the world.


BIO: Chris Killen once wrote the best eight word book ever in history. He deleted his facebook account.  Then he went back in time and stopped himself from deleting his facebook account.  He calls this reactivation.  He now has facebook, at least until he goes back in time and stops the reactivation process.  He still may be single. He is skinnier than JBM. He blogs here.

i like this, but it made me

i like this, but it made me feel a little sad, too.

Anonymous (not verified) | Sat, 05/10/2008 - 14:37

success

success

Chris Killen (not verified) | Tue, 05/13/2008 - 12:03

thats sad

it made rather up-set and he must of been really depressed having not very many people to tlk to lying life less in a hosp. bed.

=( (not verified) | Wed, 05/21/2008 - 10:34

Wow...this really sucked.

Wow...this really sucked.

Anonymous (not verified) | Mon, 11/10/2008 - 23:32

Wow...this really sucked.

Wow...this really sucked. Learn how to write.

Anonymous (not verified) | Mon, 11/10/2008 - 23:33

Yeah, it was pretty bad.

Yeah, it was pretty bad. Sorry, bro. Keep writing, though. Takes a lot of practice.

Anonymous (not verified) | Fri, 01/02/2009 - 03:58

When it was time for John

When it was time for John Brower Minnoch to take a bath, the thirteen nurses would then argue over who's to do the spongin. LOL

dave at the cheap computer desk

Dave S. (not verified) | Mon, 05/25/2009 - 20:21

1983

I was born 20 October 1983...Wonder If there is anything different about people in that year?

Scorn (not verified) | Fri, 06/12/2009 - 01:54

There is no way that this

There is no way that this can't be a joke.  I mean it's hilarious.

 

randy (not verified) | Tue, 09/29/2009 - 19:38

FREAKIN' STUPID!!!!!!

FREAKIN' STUPID!!!!!!

ERIC (not verified) | Tue, 10/20/2009 - 14:28

Jon the boy

When  I was a small child I lived with Jon and his mother, father and grandfather.  He was badly abused by his parents.  He was only 9 years old and I can remember covering my ears at night so that I didn't hear his screams as his father beat him. I couldn't help him as I was only 4. Somehow I knew that  life would probably be rough for him.  I didn't keep in touch as I was so relieved when I was taken away from there.  When I think back I remember him as a pretty good kid. I do hope that in his short life he experienced some joy because he definitely didn't have any as a child.  Goodbye and God bless you Jon.

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