Dear Bernie #5

Dear Bernie,

I've noticed over the years you don't watch many movies. I'm curious why you don’t. I've sometimes wondered if you even know what a movie is. When video stores still existed and I used to bring home video cassettes you probably thought I was bringing home food. I think you still think the VCR is some kind of food machine. I bet if I put the VCR are the ground you would try and eat it. That is why the VCR is kept on the top shelf of the entertainment system. The only reason I bring this up is because I saw this movie last night I think you may have liked. Val Kilmer was in it. He was probably twenty-eight. His best friend in the movie was fifteen. They lived in the same room and made lasers. I think their relationship was very similar to yours and mine. You're like Val Kilmer and I’m like the fifteen year old boy. Except you're older than 28. You’re almost ninety or something. If you ever figure out what a VCR is and video stores make a comeback you should rent this movie. I believe there are some dogs in the movie that will make you laugh and say, “Why did they do that?” Another thing I've also been watching lately is 30 Rock. You remind me of the girl in the show, Liz Lemon (played by Tina Fey). She is always worried that her ovaries are dying and that she will die a lonely single hag with no children. I feel sometimes you worry about these things. Then again, maybe you’re more like Allen Baldwin. There was this one episode where Allen Baldwin is eating a lot and putting sandwiches in his pockets. I feel if you had sandwiches you would put sandwiches in your pockets.

-Mark