43 Slides: game 00038

I went swimming in my girlfriend's grandfather's pool on Sunday. People got wet in different positions and at various locations in time. I was the first to get wet. Eight additional points were awarded to my self-esteem. Pool activities ranged from floating to sinking to breathing underwater by exhaling out your mouth and in through the nose to choking on pool water to coughing. Eventually, I was the only one left in the pool. I floated a little. Then I sank. I was bored. Fans were leaving the stadium. Many complained to the ushers and wondered if they could get a refund. I felt bad for the hardworking fathers who had brought their sons to the game and now their sons were bored and wanted to go home to play videogames. I was a failure. My teammates and opponents were lying together on deckchairs, sunning and dozing. The sport of afternoon swimming at my girlfriend's grandfather's pool was on its last leg. I climbed the waterslide. When I got to the top I acknowledged the fans still watching. Some booed. I didn't care. My girlfriend's grandfather booed the loudest. He said, "You look good, but you could lose some weight in your trunk area." I thanked the old man and slid down the slide. At the bottom I fell in the pool. I was thankful the slide worked correctly. The grandfather was still throwing around racial epithets and cussing. I said, "Don't get all bent out of shape because a little water got out of the pool." He said, "My wife is dead. I miss her very much." I swam to the other end of the pool and got out. Most of the stadium was empty. A few stragglers pointed to the sky. An eagle was circling. Someone on a deck chair said, "Have you seen that video of the eagle eating a mountain goat." I had not at the time. I had only seen the video of the octopus eating the shark. I ran back to the slide. I conquered it. I fell in the pool again. Minor victories were achieved and I didn't drown. I climbed out of the pool again and ran back to the slide. I conquered it again. I continued to conquer it. I would end up conquering it 43 times. Later, standing at my locker with a towel I was asked to comment on my victory, but all I could think of was my girlfriend's grandfather, half deaf, chewing on his tongue, upset because his grandson went in his closet and stole a shirt.